Do you get to the end of the day stressed, unhappy, wishing for something more? Have you done a lot of things but in the end feel like you have accomplished nothing? Did you overeat or choose MacDonald's instead of something nourishing for your body? Well then you are who I am talking to, and yes I do it too!
Our days are made up of our habits, and one important practice to incorporate into our lives is being good to ourselves. Being good to ourselves sets the expectation that we deserve to be treated better. It pushes us to limit the people in our lives that treat us poorly; we will remove the negativity, and we will treat others better.
Consider the instructions on a plane where they tell you to put the air mask on yourself before helping others. We cannot be great to others if we do not take the time to respect ourselves, our needs and our desires.
Identify your Stressors
Take some time each morning and think, what would it be like to be good to me today. What stops you from having a beautiful meal sitting and chatting with a friend or loved one? What causes you to pick up the cigarette instead of replacing it with some real self-love? Do you need to stop hanging around the negative people and remove the idle gossip from your day, replacing it with people who inspire you to grow? Whatever the things are in your life that provides you stress, take the time to clean them up, throw them out or fix them.
Pay attention to Your Emotions
Our feelings are clear indicators of how we are treating ourselves. Are you happy, inspired, peaceful, relaxed, excited in this moment? Or are you angry, upset, crying, frustrated, stressed at this time? If you are the latter than pay attention to the cues, what happened and how can I eliminate that from my life?
What do you Want
Next step is to define what do you want? What is being good look like to you? Each of us is different and we have different desires, dreams and things that provide benefit. Maybe you are someone who gets a high from running or doing exercise. Perhaps you love to play with your children. Or, you have spent so much time just doing that you have forgotten what it is like to feel good. If so, think back to your childhood, what was fun for you? Did you like to paint or sing, maybe you like to pull the car apart and put it back together? Find those things and add them to your life, and remove the things that don't provide benefit to allow the space for the right things.
Build the Habit
Finally, I want you to create the habit of being kind to yourself. Take a few minutes each morning visualising the act of whatever activity makes you feel good. For example, imagine the act of responding to walking away from negative people without getting pulled down with them. Athletes visualise regularly to perform at the top of their game. This process prepares your mind for the habit of being kind to yourself, making it easy to execute when the time comes. I recommend visualising for 10 minutes daily until you have engrained the habit of being kind to yourself. It is not something that will happen overnight. It is something that takes time depending on you and your situation. For someone, it may take one week, for others 30 days or longer. The habit develops with practices, and it will take as long as it takes. The key is that it will be worth it in the long run.
My challenge to your today and ask yourself, "Am I Good to myself?" If not what do I need to change?
Wishing you Clarity, Happiness and Success In Your Great Life!